I don’t know; I go on a little holiday and, when my back is turned, things go awry. I can’t leave you kids alone for two seconds!

I hear that little Johnny Britain has taken his ball and gone home. He reckons he doesn’t want to play with the other kids anymore. I’m not sure what it’s about. Some say it’s because he didn’t like the other kids telling him what to do. Some say it’s because he didn’t want to play with the foreign kids that had been coming into the playground. I’ve also heard that someone at home told him he didn’t need other children, and he’d be fine playing on his own. Of course, he’s already feeling lonely and now no one wants him back to play. They’ve even said he can keep his football; they’ve got plenty of others. I don’t know why you kids can’t learn to get along. After all, you’re all from the same family.

Then that rotten Daesh/Isis gang of no-hopers went on a rampage again. This time they attacked poor little Turkey. It’s time those ratbags found some manners and learned to behave like civilized people. I don’t know what the answer is but we need someone with experience in working with gangs to deal with these kids. No one wants to play with them. No one wants to invite them home for dinner. No one can trust them. I feel sorry for their parents.

Aussie’s having an election today. I have mixed feelings about that. I hope he’s mature enough to handle the responsibility. Sometimes youngsters can make foolish decisions that leave a trail of disappointment and, the consequences of which, have to be lived with for quite some time afterwards. I hope he’s given this a lot of thought. And that, at least, he has got one of his mates to be the designated (non-drinking) driver. Kids grow up so fast these days.

Anyway, the Old Boy, the Wonder Dog and I are back home, ready to keep an eye on things once more, so be warned and behave.