Once upon a time, there was a charming, clever and wealthy young man  ( M. T. ) who wanted to be in politics. He wanted to help rule the land. He asked if he could represent the Labor Party. After all, he thought he held similar aspirations, including the desire for his land to stop being vassals to an overseas royal family, and he liked technology. The Labor party looked at his flash suit and heard about his millions and thought, “No way can this dude represent the workers!” They turned him down.

He then turned to the Liberal National party. They looked at his flash suit and heard about his millions and thought, “Well, he’s charming so, in spite of his leaning a little to the left on a few points, he’s probably one of us” and they accepted him.

He did quite well in his new career. He would occasionally have to take a few steps back but, nevertheless, he gradually worked his way up the ranks. He developed a tough skin and refused to let his fellow pollies’ suspicion of him and their coolness towards him, get him down. He knew that one day he’d win their trust. He even made a friend or two.

But M. T. made one huge mistake. He underestimated the ambition and hubris of Machiavellian Mr A. He’d had a couple of light duels with Mr A in the past but each time Mr A won the upper hand and M. T. retreated to the back benches and bided his time.

Then, one day, the polls were low and Mr A was on the nose with the public, so his friends said, “Have a go, mate! At least you won’t embarrass us on the world stage like Mr A does!” Once again he challenged Machiavellian Mr A to a duel and this time it was a decisive victory. Mr A was banished to the shadows and M. T. basked in his new found glory.

But that wasn’t the end of Mr A. Oh no. You see, he was a certified, card-carrying member of the “true blue” Liberal National party and M. T. was only ever considered an interloper. Mr A worked on his colleagues’ suspicions. “You know he doesn’t like the queen,” he’d whisper in their ears. “Remember when he crossed the floor and voted with Labor on Climate Change? He’s such a lefty!”

In particular, he groomed his protege, Mr D, and one sunny day, when M. T. was being charmingly ineffectual and oblivious to his danger, Mr D struck, challenging him to a duel. Poor M. T. couldn’t believe it. He knew he was a dead man walking. At the last minute, in the obligatory plot twist, Mr Scomo stepped into the breach and also challenged everyone to a duel. In the end, Scomo became the new P.M., and Mr D crept into the shadows to stand next to his Machiavellian mentor, to wait for another sunny day. They were content. The interloper had finally been purged from the party. Revenge is sweet.

To be continued…